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You’ve probably heard the saying before, maybe more than once, but Marcus Aurelius, the great philosopher-emperor, had it nailed: “Don’t be overheard complaining, not even to yourself.” It’s one of those timeless pieces of wisdom that many of us brush off, but today, we’re going to unpack why this isn’t just good advice—it’s essential for living a better life.

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Breaking Through – Who’s Really in Your Way – Life Stories 244

Who or what is really stopping you from reaching your success? Sit with that for a moment. Because I’m about to give you an answer, and you might not like it. The truth? The only person stopping you is you. No one else is holding you back. Every other answer is just an excuse, a soft blanket wrapped around your fears. The world isn’t conspiring against you. No one is plotting your downfall. They’re too busy planning their own rise. The biggest obstacles in your way are the ones you’ve created.

We’ve looked at the top reasons people give for not achieving their goals, and guess what? When you pull back the curtain, it’s always the same answer. It’s never external factors; it always starts and stops with you. One of the biggest culprits? Procrastination. People love to blame it on laziness, but that’s another excuse—a convenient way to dismiss what’s really happening. Procrastination isn’t about being lazy; it’s about fear. It’s your brain trying to protect you from failure. Every time you delay, you’re avoiding negative feelings like boredom, anxiety, insecurity, frustration, and self-doubt. Those emotions show up, and instead of facing them, you hit the pause button and step back. You don’t even attempt to overcome the challenge because your fear is louder than your desire to succeed. But here’s the thing: if procrastination is on you, then guess what? You can control it. You have the power to decide that enough is enough. You can push through those feelings and move forward, and that shift changes everything.

Another excuse we hear all the time is, “My friends and family don’t believe in me.” Let’s clear something up—nobody owes you their belief. It’s not some kind of debt they’re obligated to pay. Your friends and family are just trying to live their own lives. If you’re constantly turning to them for validation and motivation, it means you need to work on your self-confidence. You need to be your own source of belief before you expect anyone else to get on board. And sometimes, it’s not that they don’t believe in you—it’s that your ideas are big and scary, and they’re worried you’ll get hurt. They care about you, but that’s their fear talking. Your belief isn’t their job—it’s yours. You owe it to yourself to believe in your own potential. After all, why should they believe in you if you don’t even believe in yourself?

And here’s a harsh truth: if you’re losing motivation, then you never really had it to begin with. What you had was willpower, and willpower is fleeting. It’s that quick burst of energy you get when you hear about someone else’s success or when you feel inspired for a moment. But motivation? Real motivation is something you have to build, brick by brick. It’s not a spike of energy—it’s a steady line, powered by self-discipline. It doesn’t disappear when things get tough. It doesn’t evaporate when you have a bad day. Motivation isn’t about feeling good; it’s about staying committed, even when everything around you feels like it’s falling apart. You need a plan, because without one, your goal is just a wish. How are you going to handle setbacks? How bad do things have to get before you hit pause on your dream? And when you do pause, how long are you willing to stay on hold?

Another common roadblock? “I just don’t have the resources.” Some people are born into difficult circumstances—single-parent households, financial struggles, lack of education. Maybe they had to leave school early to start working. It’s a tough hand to be dealt, but here’s the thing: other people have faced the same challenges and still made it. Millionaires who started with nothing, billionaires who grew up in poverty. The person you envy driving that luxury car might not have started off rich. They could have been the kid who had to leave school at 16 to get a job. And if they could do it, so can you. It won’t be easy. It never is. But blaming your circumstances won’t get you anywhere. You can’t just wait for someone to save you. You are your own safety net.

Look, nobody is going to come and drag you to success. The excuses, the self-doubt, the fear—they’re all part of the blame game. And playing the blame game is a guaranteed way to get stuck. If you keep telling yourself that your environment or your circumstances are the problem, you’ll never find your way out. But if you take responsibility? If you own your situation and commit to figuring it out? That’s when things start to change. You’ve got to extract the lessons from your failures and discard the rest. Don’t carry your failures with you like heavy baggage. Learn what you need to and move on. You’re starting from the bottom? That’s fine. Every success story starts there. It’s not about where you begin—it’s about where you’re going and how you’re getting there.

Winners and losers often have the same goals. The difference is, winners take responsibility for their failures and keep pushing forward, while losers stay stuck in the blame game. So which one are you going to be? Are you going to let fear and excuses stand in your way, or are you going to own your life and keep moving forward, no matter what?

As the saying goes, “If you hang around the barbershop long enough, eventually you’ll get a haircut.” Keep working, keep pushing, and eventually, luck will find you. But you’ve got to be there, doing the work, to catch that break when it comes. Success isn’t about waiting for the perfect moment—it’s about creating the moment. So don’t stand in your own way. The only person stopping you from reaching your full potential is you.

And until next time, keep on rising.

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