Freeing Yourself from Childhood Conditioning – Life Stories 95

Freeing Yourself from Childhood Conditioning – Life Stories 95



Did you know most of your core beliefs were shaped before the age of seven? Childhood conditioning programs your mind like a blueprint, influencing your decisions, relationships, and even self-worth.



Freeing Yourself from Childhood Conditioning

Going Back to the Beginning: Your Childhood Conditioning

It’s become almost cliché to say that everything relates back to our childhood experiences—both the joys and the traumas. People laugh it off, uncomfortable with how much weight these experiences carry. We hear people joke about someone’s “daddy issues” or “mother wound” as a way to deflect, but the laughter is uneasy because deep down, we know there’s truth buried there.

Our childhood is where so much of our foundational programming is set. Before the age of seven, children primarily operate in a theta brain state. This state is linked to imagination and creativity, and it’s where children live in the most present sense—watching, absorbing, and internalizing everything they experience. These early years are where many of our deeply held beliefs about ourselves and the world around us are formed.

The Child’s Mind: Egocentric by Design

At this stage, the child’s mind is highly egocentric. This doesn’t mean children are selfish; it’s a survival mechanism. It means they interpret everything as if it’s happening because of them. A child in a chaotic environment may think they’re the cause of the chaos. They might believe they’re not good enough, smart enough, or lovable enough to create a happy home. The child’s mind is constantly searching for meaning, but at this early stage, it’s not capable of rational or critical thought. So, children often come to harmful conclusions about their own worth.

Let’s consider an example: Say you grew up in a household where nothing was ever good enough. Meals were never cooked right, music was always terrible, and other people were constantly labeled as idiots. It would make sense for a child exposed to this to internalize the belief that they’re a screw-up, too. The negativity shapes how they view themselves and the world, and unfortunately, these beliefs often become the lens through which they see everything.

Your Beliefs Shape Your Reality

The brain is a meaning-making machine, and it’s always looking for proof to validate the beliefs it’s formed, even if those beliefs are false. If a child believes they’re unworthy or not enough, they’ll unconsciously seek out experiences that reinforce this view. Our beliefs shape our world more than we often realize.

Let that sink in: Your beliefs create your experiences.

Because most of this programming happens unconsciously in early childhood, many people have no idea what kind of system they’re operating under. As the ancient Greek philosopher Socrates said, “There is no learning without remembering.” In other words, to truly learn and grow, we must first remember where our beliefs originated.






Conditioning and Deconditioning: The Path to Growth

Not all conditioning is bad. Many people have positive programming from their early years, but no matter the nature of your childhood, it’s crucial to understand that none of it was your fault. Children are wholly dependent on the adults around them to meet their needs. You are not responsible for what happened to you, but you are responsible for your healing.

Unresolved trauma and negative programming manifest in our lives and relationships, shaping how we act and react. That’s why it’s so common to focus on trying to change behavior rather than addressing the beliefs driving those behaviors. Take, for example, people who struggle with emotional eating. They know it’s harming their health, but the root of the problem isn’t the behavior—it’s the underlying belief that they’re unworthy of a healthy body, often formed in childhood.

Your Beliefs Are the Blueprint

Our beliefs are the blueprint of how we see ourselves. Everything we do—our behaviors, choices, and habits—are built upon that foundation. Today, we want to help you start identifying some of those beliefs.

Reflection Exercise: Identifying Childhood Beliefs

Take a moment to think about some of the beliefs you’ve held about yourself since childhood, both positive and negative. Are you outgoing or more reserved? Do you see yourself as intelligent, lazy, capable, or unorganized? Write down some of these beliefs in the notes section below or in your personal journal. This will serve as a valuable reference as you progress on your journey. You might be amazed at how much these beliefs change as you grow.

Take care of yourself, and remember: your beliefs are powerful, but they’re not fixed. You have the ability to reshape them and, in doing so, reshape your life.




SHARE THIS STORY



Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *